Our two gentleman thieves are still in lockdown, but somehow both managed to obtain microphones for this month’s episode. So fret not, audio quality is much better than last time, content quality as well.
Did you know that COVID-19 is a fake and also a government conspiracy to mind control non lizard people and distract from the fact that the moon is headed towards the earth where slave children labour away in the name of the Rothschild family to have their teeth removed for pianos? Well, if you didn’t, that just means you are sane.
Unlike German R’n’B singer Xavier Naidoo, who keeps going on his conspiracy rants. That has not only made the artist of South African/Indian/Irish/German descent a poster child for the far right, but also cost him his job on the jury of “Germany’s Got Talent”. Let’s see how he does without his famous sunglasses then, shall we?
Prison can’t keep two gentleman thieves back, lockdown can’t keep two gentleman thieves back, and neither can varying audio quality. Corona rules apply, so social distancing, no fancy suits, no first class flights.
Join us for episode 20 of our podcast as Oskar and Sebastian steal from the richest prick on Earth Jeffaniel Jeffrey Bezos and his Dr. Manhattan style 10,000 year clock plan near the Blue Horizon space port.
The man might not pay his fair share in taxes, but does he look like an egg with an ex-wife that has a stripper’s name.
We dive deep into mountains, physics, and Bezos’ arch rival in all things space travel Elon “Elongated” Musk.
No commander in chief is complete without two of them! That’s testicles and Air Force One and Air Force One II – Electric Boogaloo.
Just in time for the upcoming US election pitting one old white man against another, our gentleman thief Sebastian (not that old, white, man) and vixen of crime Judith will steal the president’s plane. How, why, and mostly how? Well, listen in as the two plan golf trips, gilly suits, and photo shoots.
Friend of the show Judith Shoemaker still fills in for Oskar this month, so send her lots of love on Instagram (@shoedith_jumaker) and follow her miscellaneous adventures and shenanigans.
A diamond might be forever, but it can still change hands.
On November 7th 2000 seven criminals attempted to steal the Millennium Star diamond with brute force and a speed boat and were caught before they could get a hand on the loot. On February 7th 2020 Judith and Sebastian will succeed where they failed. And also use a speed boat.
Stealing from shady individuals is what we do in the heist lounge and few corporations are as shady as De Beers, diamond dealers by day with only a few blood diamonds in the mix, and international conglomerate with flexible labour laws by night. They were also the inventors of the concept of the engagement ring in 1940s.
Unlike hosts, diamonds linger… Friend of the show Judith Shoemaker fills in for Oskar this month, so send her lots of love on Instagram (@shoedith_jumaker) and find out the story behind her handle in this episode. Sizzle.
Nothing is quite as fashionable as crime… perhaps the world’s most famous Birman cat Choupette. Now that her previous owner Karl Lagerfeld designs black suits in – optimistically – Limbo, she is left to her own devices and Lagerfeld’s millions.
Together with special guest Erman Jones our two gentleman thieves plan for a speedy getaway on the catwalk, designer perfumes, expensive suits (as always), and lots of catnip.
It’s time for our two gentleman thieves to don their sexy cat lady costumes and become true cat burglars. Andrew Lloyd Webber who blatantly stole writing credits from the 1981 cast of “Cats – the Musical” as they performed and improvised a play about jellicle (not a word, we checked) cats (very much a word) will now pay for his crimes along with everyone set out to ruin the careers of Idris Elba, Sir Ian McKellen, and James Cordon… Nevermind, Cordon and his carpool karaoke will be thrown under the bus.
So listen to our new episode in which we spend sixty minutes introducing ourselves in song and sending you to Heaviside as we steal every copy of “Cats – the Musical – the Film” and turn it into “Cats – the Musical – the Film – the Porn”.
In our 15th episode our two gentleman thieves go down under! Together with Alasdair and Andy from Two in the Think Tank we steal something very comfortable and very right wing.
Pauline Hanson from Australia’s One Nation Party has a seat in the Australian Senate in Canberra. For now. Attempting to unseat her and leave the woman standing right near the urethra of the Australian Phallic Chamber of the senate, we’ll have to use jet skis, newspaper ads, a giant golden coat of course, and Grig. Our very own character that is just original enough to not be a mock up Grug.